Fitness became an addiction that left me anxious and sleep deprived
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Wayne Davies says he became obsessed with fitness, training plans and data A runner says he became so consumed by a fitness addiction that he spiralled into anxiety and became sleep deprived.
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Wayne Davies said he was left "constantly worrying" about race times, training plans and fitness data and comparing himself to other runners on social media.
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The 40-year-old said it felt like the "rug was being pulled from under my feet", before he was signposted to NHS Wales where he was able to regain control.
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An expert said she had seen an increase in search traffic for fitness addiction in recent months as society talks more honestly about these behaviours.
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Wayne, from Newtown in Powys, began running about 10 years ago as a way of keeping fit but said he reached a "real low point" at the height of his addiction as his sleep suffered, concentration declined and anxiety began to affect other areas of his life.
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After starting with casual jogs he quickly progressed to marathons, before taking on ultra-distance races including a gruelling 75 miles (120km) around the Llŷn Peninsula in Gwynedd.
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"I became obsessed with trying to do longer and longer distances," he said, "then I started focusing on times."
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"I was never happy, and always chasing the next challenge or trying to get a better time."
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To Wayne, it felt like the "end of the world" if he didn't succeed.
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"I never stopped to appreciate what I'd achieved," he said. Wayne said it felt like the "end of the world" if he did not hit his target He said his struggle intensified following a heart scare during a training run, which led to him being diagnosed with atrial fibrillation, a heart rhythm condition.
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Although he returned to running after treatment, he constantly worried the condition would recur, and realised it was becoming an obsession.
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Wayne said he never realised a fitness addiction existed until he spoke up about it, saying he was just trying to "get better all the time."
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"Since I shared the story I've had a a lot of people saying they can relate to it," he said.
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"I probably wasn't open about it before because you feel like you're going to get judged."
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His friends and family encouraged him to seek help through his GP, who signposted him to the Powys-based charity, Ponthafren.
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"A lot of men think talking about how they feel is a sign of weakness, and I admit I did feel a bit ashamed at first," he said.
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"But taking that first step was probably the best thing I ever did."
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After enrolling on the NHS Wales SilverCloud Space from Anxiety programme, he worked through a 12-week course, learning "how to manage my thoughts and let things go".
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He said: "I don't tend to look at the data as much anymore.
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I just accept it for what it is."
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He sometimes uses his watch as a guideline when running, but no longer "obsesses over it", adding that he "goes by how I feel on the day". Wayne wants to encourage others to seek help if fitness is having a negative effect on their lives He had been in training for the The Marathon Eryri, formerly the Snowdonia Marathon, but it was announced on Friday evening that the race would be cancelled because of stormy weather.
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Speaking before the cancellation, Wayne said he would approach the race with a new outlook.
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"I'm not worried about times anymore," he said.
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"I just want to do the best I can on the day and enjoy it."
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Wayne said he thought more men should feel comfortable reaching out for support when they need it.
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"People do want to listen and there are tools out there that can help. It's not as scary as you think."
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The inaugural Marathon Eryri was held in 1982 Zaheen Ahmed, head of therapy at UK Addiction Treatment Centre, said she had seen an increase of fitness addiction cases, with more than 57,000 people seeking help from their exercise addiction page in the past six months.
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"Typically this stems from clients embarking on sobriety and cross-addicting into fitness, to the point where that in itself then becomes the problem instead of substances," she said. She said fitness apps had added a competitive element to "inform and advise" people in a way that could not be done a decade ago, but this can lead to compulsive behaviour disorder.
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"If fitness has overtaken your daily joy sources, then it's likely a problem has developed," she added.
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Zaheen said she did not think addictions were changing, but instead "we just have the means and desire to talk more openly and honestly about these behaviours".
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"As life evolves and as a society we're exposed to more things to do, more ways to be engaged, there are more opportunities for unhealthy relationships develop."
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Dafydd Judd is a personal trainer in Cardiff Dafydd Judd, a personal trainer in Cardiff, said he felt the "lines are blurring" between fitness and technology addiction.
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He said calorie counting apps could become "highly addictive" if you were weighing, measuring and adjusting your calorie intake.
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"There's way more food to track than there is with exercise, so I can see how that can get extremely obsessive," he added.
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Dafydd encouraged people to seek help if its starts to become an unhealthy relationship to ensure you are "channelling your energy in the right way".
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He also advised people to be wary when seeing fitness records posted online as there are an increasing number of people "fudging the numbers and lying to to create this illusion that they're better than they are".
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He described social media as a "double-edged sword" when helping people to stay fit.
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"Companies are tapping into social media to help promote their business, but on the flip side, it creates these communities," he said, adding that "healthy competition" online can spur people on.
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Fionnuala Clayton, project manager of NHS Wales' Online Cognitive Behavioural Therapy Service, said they were "grateful Wayne reached out during a "challenging time in his life".
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Clayton said that while exercise has mood-boosting benefits, "too much can can have negative impacts on both mental and physical health".
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She said it was important to reach out for support if a routine starts to dominate other areas of your life.
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"Talking to someone and exploring other sources of support can be an important step towards a healthier balance," she said.
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"Stories like Wayne's remind us why accessible mental health support matters."
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